During Our Darkest Times
Depression can make you feel hopeless, Anxiety can make you feel hopeless. Sometimes, even darkness can make you feel a sense of hopelessness. You can begin convincing yourself that darkness actually means hopelessness. But it doesn't. This couldn't be any farther from the truth. The reality is we all go through dark times in life. And although our darkness may look and feel different depending on the person, this doesn't make hope any less obtainable, no matter how broken and lifeless one may feel.
I had the chance to go to the St. Augustine Lighthouse last month and climb to the top. I had always been afraid of heights, but I made myself climb, taking breaths and holding on to the railings really tight. Once I made it to the top, I was amazed at what I was viewing. I could see clearly across the city of St. Augustine and it was breathtaking. It reminded me of how God can see what we can not see from where we normally stand. He sees our future and His light can guide us through our darkest times. I remember thinking as I hastily made my way back down the stairs about the verse Proverbs 3:5-6, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”
Hopeless is how I found myself spending most of my life. But what I perceived as hopelessness was actually just darkness in disguise. It wasn't until I learned to admit that it was okay to not be okay, share my hurt with others, and grab hold of God that things started to change for me. The darkness started to lift, and hope began saturating every piece of my life. It wasn't immediate. It took time. It also did not prevent darkness from trying to control me on a daily basis. But God was there and He was present.
Hope is one of those things we can't outrun no matter how quick and witty we think we are. It's always one step ahead of us, waiting to be seen and grabbed hold of. God's love, regardless if you believe in it or not, is a light in dark and weary times. It's a lighthouse to a ship lost in a sea of giant waves, and life-raft for those who are sinking.